Since the time that I began receiving steroids along with my chemotherapy, I noticed an increase in the amount of talking I do. Now, for those of you that know me, that may be a horrifying thought. For a time, I subjected those that love me -- and those that like me only a lit
tle -- to a barrage of non-stop chatter. I expected that effect to wear off once I got off the steroids. Not so.
The Chemo I’m receiving now, and will be getting for the next eight months, is made up of only Herceptin, Benadryl and a Saline drip. Yet, I still ramble - incessantly. And, as if that wasn’t bad enough, I can’t stay on topic for more that a few seconds.
As I’ve been told, it’s not the volume of speaking that is a problem, but the way I race through topics. Like a crazed housewife on a 30 second winning spree through a supermarket, I stay on a topic only long enough to demonstrate that I actually had a thought. To make matters worse, there are no pauses between thoughts or subjects. Although, to be fair, in my mind there are.
A conversation might now go something like this:
Neighbor: Hey, how are you?
Me: Fine. You? (So far, so good)
Neighbor: Great. Say, have you seen the gardeners this week?
Me: I think they were here yesterday. (looking down at the front lawn) Dang, I have to weed. (Noticing my neighbor’s feet) Say, are those new shoes? Can you believe all the rain we’ve had? Soon we’ll have to get the Ark out of the garage. Hey! Did I tell you that I submitted an article to the New York Times? That reminds me, did you see the article in there yesterday about the dog run? It was in the City section, I think. The paper is getting too expensive, I might have to cut back my subscription, but I hate to do all my reading online. I’m so pooped at night I barely stay awake long enough to read a paragraph. Have you read THE CELL, by Stephen King? A grabber from the get-go. I should get my eyes checked. In fact, I should also make a dentist appointment at the same time. Look! Bob and Ruth are back! (Off I go, leaving my poor neighbor dizzy and slack-jawed)
And yet, I hear the pauses. But maybe, like the sound of a dog whistle, only I can hear them.
©2006 Annelise Pichardo
tle -- to a barrage of non-stop chatter. I expected that effect to wear off once I got off the steroids. Not so.The Chemo I’m receiving now, and will be getting for the next eight months, is made up of only Herceptin, Benadryl and a Saline drip. Yet, I still ramble - incessantly. And, as if that wasn’t bad enough, I can’t stay on topic for more that a few seconds.
As I’ve been told, it’s not the volume of speaking that is a problem, but the way I race through topics. Like a crazed housewife on a 30 second winning spree through a supermarket, I stay on a topic only long enough to demonstrate that I actually had a thought. To make matters worse, there are no pauses between thoughts or subjects. Although, to be fair, in my mind there are.
A conversation might now go something like this:
Neighbor: Hey, how are you?
Me: Fine. You? (So far, so good)
Neighbor: Great. Say, have you seen the gardeners this week?
Me: I think they were here yesterday. (looking down at the front lawn) Dang, I have to weed. (Noticing my neighbor’s feet) Say, are those new shoes? Can you believe all the rain we’ve had? Soon we’ll have to get the Ark out of the garage. Hey! Did I tell you that I submitted an article to the New York Times? That reminds me, did you see the article in there yesterday about the dog run? It was in the City section, I think. The paper is getting too expensive, I might have to cut back my subscription, but I hate to do all my reading online. I’m so pooped at night I barely stay awake long enough to read a paragraph. Have you read THE CELL, by Stephen King? A grabber from the get-go. I should get my eyes checked. In fact, I should also make a dentist appointment at the same time. Look! Bob and Ruth are back! (Off I go, leaving my poor neighbor dizzy and slack-jawed)
And yet, I hear the pauses. But maybe, like the sound of a dog whistle, only I can hear them.
©2006 Annelise Pichardo
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